


Looking Glass

by Vipersweb (Rhianona)



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-02-07
Updated: 2009-02-07
Packaged: 2017-10-10 12:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/99769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhianona/pseuds/Vipersweb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tag to Continuum - Vala's thoughts after returning from settling Ba'al's host.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Looking Glass

After Vala returns from settling Ba'al's former host on a planet where no one will mind that he once had what amounted to a parasite with delusions of grandeur and world conquest, inhabiting his body, and after she "debriefs" (really an interrogation) with Landry, and after she clears the infirmary, she joins Teal'c in his rooms for a marathon _Star Wars_ viewing. The rest of SG-1, or so Teal'c informs her, have taken advantage of their downtime to go elsewhere. Mitchell has chosen to visit his parents, which causes Vala to hope he brings back one of his mother's freshly baked pies. Daniel has gone to investigate some new artifacts at the Oriental Institute - he thinks, or so Teal'c intones, that they date to the Goa'uld occupation, and he hopes to find something of interest in them. As for Sam, she's busy outfitting the _General Hammond_, readying the latest 303 for launch. Vala wonders idly whether she'll hold command of the ship longer than she did Atlantis.

All of this leaves Vala feeling as if she should have remained off world. It's not even the fact that only of her team has remained on base to greet her that bothers her. It's the way Muscles acts that does it. Teal'c has never really let go his Jaffa stoic behavior. Even to Sam and Daniel - his teammates for over ten years - he can often remain an enigma. But Vala was once Goa'uld, and even if Qetesh is gone from her (and thank the gods for that!), she can still read a Jaffa's body language. Teal'c appears restless, even if he projects calm.

"You're planning on leaving, aren't you?" she asks abruptly in the middle of _The Empire Strikes Back_. Teal'c turns and frowns - as much as he does - at her. Vala knows that half of it is due to her interrupting his beloved movie.

He remains quiet for a while, letting Luke, Yoda and that annoying beeping robot debate some pointless philosophy on the screen. She remains silent, waiting to see how he responds. She's pretty sure he won't dissemble in front of her; he respects her too much to do so. They've bonded on the fact that they were both once slaves to the Goa'uld. None of the others really understand just how much that has damaged them. For all the difficulties their teammates have encountered while going through the 'gate, they've not spent years not having control over their own body, sharing space with a parasite, who couldn't care less what their host wanted. And yes, Teal'c was Jaffa and not a Goa'uld host, but their experiences weren't so different as to be impossible to draw parallels between.

"The Jaffa are rebuilding. I have been requested to join the Jaffa council and offer my advice," Teal'c finally says.

"And Sam has the _General Hammond_," Vala says.

"Indeed," Teal'c agrees, nodding his head. He hesitates for a moment. "I do not believe Daniel Jackson will wish to go through the _chappa'ai_ as frequently as he once did."

"No… he won't, will he?" Vala mused. "Too much has happened." Poor Daniel. He's not had an easy time of it. "And Mitchell?"

Teal'c remains quiet for a long moment. "He will rebuild SG-1 and make it his own." Poor Cameron; he's lived in the shadow of Jack O'Neill and his SG-1 ever since he took command of the team and convinced Daniel, Teal'c and Sam to return. Vala wonders if he'll have room for her on his team.

_The Empire Strikes Back_ plays on, while they both pretend to watch. For all Vala knows, Teal'c really is watching. For herself, she's trying to figure whether it's time for her to live. She never really thought she would remain on Earth for the rest of her life. She's been running way too long for that to feel comfortable. More than that, she knows she discomforts the SGC and IOA. She's not like Teal'c - the fierce alien warrior, who fights to overthrow his masters. Landry doesn't even allow her to go off base without an escort! She's very much aware that they don't really trust her.

The time away from the SGC, time spent helping the newly freed host, had also helped Vala define the vague, uncomfortable feeling she had been having lately. She fought at their side against the Ori because it was right and it involved her daughter, for all that Adria had never really _been_ hers. But now? The war is over, and the rest of the galaxy is picking up the pieces, trying to figure out how to live without megalomaniacs ruling over them.

She's just not sure she has a place here anymore. Once, she had thought Daniel might be enough to keep her here, but he's pulled back in the months since the end of the Ori threat. Sam has already left once, and even though she came back, she's about to leave again. Vala doesn't think Sam has room for her on the _General Hammond_ \- or that she would necessarily want her. And, as much as she adores Cam, Vala won't remain with SG-1 simply to keep him company - especially given the SGC's attitude towards her.

"It's time to stand on our own, isn't it…" she observes quietly. Teal'c nods his head gravely. She snorts. "I wonder, Muscles, however did we survive, that fifty years, stuck together, without anywhere to go?"

"You know, Vala Mal Doran, that I will not tell you what passed," Teal'c scolds her. She frowns.

"I know. I'm still curious, though."

"Indeed."

She sighs. "When are the others coming back?" She wants to say goodbye this time. Always before, when she's left, she goes without word, slipping away and disappearing into the night. She won't do that this time. She cares too much.

"Daniel Jackson and Colonel Mitchell return next week. Samantha Carter returns this weekend," Teal'c informs her.

"Team night next Friday?" Vala asks.

"Colonel Mitchell indicated that."

"I'll tell them then."

Bonds forged by war, can sometimes withstand peace. But not without trust. And Vala is tired of having her every move watched, of living underground, and not being allowed outside the Mountain without an escort. It's time for her to move on. She'll miss them. But with no real incentive to remain, she needs to go forth, forge her own path and discover who she is.

_/fin_


End file.
